Rooster Teeth Animated Adventures – Disease Movie Theatre


[Burnie] I don’t like movies like that; B: Super disease Movies. [Michael] I don’t like movies like that ’cause they usually suck. I hate when it’s just like, “Oh, my God”– it takes like an hour to get it going. It’s just like, “Get the fucking disease already.” Like, it finally starts spreading and at first people are like “It’s just a cold.” “Forget about it,” And, “Just eat a fucking sandwich.” And then it’s like, you know, you’re in some secret room, like, in the White House or something B: They’re like “Mr. President” B: “We’re fucked!” M: And then he’s like, “We gotta get to the bunker!” Usually people are pounding on desks or something. And then the movie will have some sort of, like, ambiguous ending; like, either everyone dies, or like two people will be immune to it. And it’s like, “We made it!” But like the rest of the planet is, like, dead already. Burnie: There is a small theater in a tiny little shit-ball mall called the Dobie Theater. I can’t tell you how terrible this fuckin’ theater was. They had pillars in the middle of the fucking movie theater!! Gus: There was also no incline for the seats; you sat in a flat room. So if anyone sat in front of you, you know, one row in front of you, Or ten rows in front of you, They were still in the fucking way. B: there’s a couple theaters where the seats don’t FACE THE SCREEN! Gus: Yeah. Geoff: It’s true. Gus: How did they ever go out of business? B: ‘Cause They suck dick. (everyone laughs) B: They suck dick so badly They suck dick at sucking dick. (Laughter)

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Reader Comments

  1. Jackson Rockwell

    I don't know who's better.
    Dr. 'Eat a fuckin' sandwich' Jones or Dr. 'Just stop being sick' Free.
    Also, who the fuck made Joel president?

  2. Jesus Rodriguez

    damn dobie theatre i know that place. theres a card shop there and we all play yugioh every saturday right in front of it. they recently started remodeling that place up.

  3. Katie C

    To everyone talking about Ebola and then to people saying it can't be about Ebola because of when it was made.

    Ebola has been around a pretty long time already. It was first found in 1976 (apparently, according to google.) And they've known it was deadly and quite bad for years. It's just that basically no one important gave a fuck until Americans started getting sick. Then it was officially a big deal and everyone needed to stop it, or else.

    So no, it's not about Ebola, but it's not because of the reasons you think. It's because people knew Ebola was bad shit, but they just didn't care enough back when it first came around and was only in Africa to make a big deal out of it.

  4. LadyShay

    There was this movie, IDK what it was called, but the crazy desease that nearly killed everyone came from this chick that was on a business trip. And during that business ttip she was cheating on her husband with some duche we never get to see. The entire time I'm thinking "Oh he got desease from him". But no, at the very end of the movie when everyone was about to be cured, it showed some retarded chef that was handling raw pig meat that didn't bother to wash his hands and then going to shake hands with the chick. And I'm just thinking "What the fuck was with the cheating subplot if that's not what caused the outbreak?! It didn't lead to any character or plot development, and was thrown away as quickly as it was brought up!"

  5. alysa.love

    yesterday we went on a hike and i saw this tree lying on the ground and it kinda looked like a dick so i said that outloud infront of my mom, step dad, brother and my grandpa, "that tree kinda looks like a dick" and my family had wide eyes, just staring at me and  idk what happened, like i didnt mean to say it outloud but it was like my brain had a mind of its own. 

    too much rooster teeth

  6. Scarabic Jones

    The logo. Licked it's lips. At the prospect of sucking a censored dick. Then planted it into it's face and then eye. The logo did that. Rooster Teeth, gettin' risque since 1992.

  7. Jonathan Lomeli

    Michael and Miles, to me, are some of the better storytellers due in large part to them giving their characters different voices. Michael uses a few here, Miles does a great impression of old people. I love that.

  8. FoenixRight

    I remember we used to have an old dollar theater that showed movies that were on their way out of circulation.  They had two levels of seating, but each was flat, so you couldn't see if someone tall sat in front of you.  There were also two huge pillars in the center area, with seats behind it.

    No backward seats, though I did see something like that when I was on travel once.

  9. Codysir

    Yeah, just looked up Dobie theater and it's reviews on Google, apparently the only reason you'd go to that place is to see how terrible it is. Burnie's analogy is correct on this one.

  10. Angela Dunn

    That's the issue I have with movies like i'll watch dawn of justice and i'll be like um I came here to watch Batman VS Superman you know the movie that was suppose to be the biggest fight in film history and it turn out to be a plug for the justice leage

  11. Nate Groves

    Googled Dobie Theater out of curiosity. sure enough a bunch of blogs written by Austin hipsters trying passively to save a shitty movie theater.

  12. Cheekychief22

    See the problem was that the doctor wasn't gavin. Because if it was Gavin it would be instantly fixed. Just stop being sick.

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