Story of a Junkie – Full Movie

[music playing] Everybody has some kind
of jones in New York City. Everybody has something that
they need to do in order to get through the day. And if you’re like me you don’t
want to really hurt anybody. Sure would like somebody
to come by you could hustle out of a few bucks. Then you’re sitting here,
you’re sick you don’t know where the fuck to get some bread. It’s like a chill
you can’t shake. Like an ache, you don’t
know where it comes from. It’s like a good love affair. It’s nice when it starts. Then it becomes fucked. It’s like everything else. You know, you could stop. I don’t know, it’s
just the best part. Let me enjoy it. It’ll only last another minute. OK? (WHISPERING) Executive brand. Works, works, works,
works, works, works, you need some works? Works, works, works,
works, works, works. Man, that stuff must be good. You need a fix captain? Yeah, why don’t you
throw me with a bag? Yo man, you crazy? Man I just copped two bags. Yo man, I’m sick like
a motherfucker bro. Hey if I could do
it I would do it. I just copped two bags. Yo man, yo man. Look, you know me right? If I could do it
I would do it man. I can’t do it. Yo man, bags man, bag ain’t
going to do nothing to you man. Hi. Hey what do you want? You got treat? I got stuff man. What do you want? Uh, two dimes. Two dimes? Two dimes of what?
-Toke. Of what? Toke. [music playing] All right, wait. And one of these fudge bars. Hey listen. Get ov– get over here. Come on. All right. All right, all right. Get your hands in your pocket
and put it right in mine. Do what? -Chop that board.
-Nah– Can I get one beer? Shut up. You see this? Keep walking.
-All right. -Turn around.
-OK. I’m going to cut–
I’m going to hurt you. All right. Get the hell out of here. Oh yeah. Look, he had a fight
today. not him, Sharky. It was about this guy
that he had a pit bull. It was a pit bull. Hey, Cisco. Hey. What’s up Gringo? How you been man? Fuck all that Gringo shit. What’s wrong with you brother? This guy taking off
with everything I had. Oh that’s too bad. Aw, gee, he got ripped off. Fuck you. What is it with you guys? When your people get ripped off
you don’t go back and kick ass. I mean, what the fuck
is wrong with you guys? You know? What’s wrong with you? Even though you were,
fighting I don’t understand. He sees you again, he’s
going to do it again man. I got a seven-inch knife
pulled on my stomach. I lost this side–
two sides of my jaw broken from fighting 15 dudes. And you know, I bit one
motherfucker’s ear off and spit it in his face. Because four of them
were jumping on me. If I’m right there and I’m
fighting I don’t mind fighting. But going back for fucking
$20, $30, you know? Well you know, you
say you and they. Whoa. And you guys, and you
whities never fight back. Shit. I mean, you know, you
got show your man’s playing with your manhood. You take your shit away
you’re going to stay there and go and not come back. He sees you the next day
he’s going to do it again. Bullshit. What are you guys, fucking
dear Abby or something? No, come on. -You’re a chico.
-Get the fuck out of here Huh?
What should I do? He’s giving your vibes man. I don’t know man. What? All right, all right. Bring your dog or
go with somebody man. I know that. I usually do. You know that Jimbo. What am I going to do? Fight back. I usually do. But today you didn’t do it. Yeah right. Ah yeah. -Same fucking guy man.
-Fuck that. What’s wrong with yous man? If you wouldn’t be getting
high none of this shit would be happening.
It’s stupid man. I don’t understand. These people are dumb man. And by people he thought
I meant just white people. And I don’t mean
just white people. I’m talking about
people that get high. And that shit is no
fucking good man. Look at them. Oh yeah. You got a cigarette
you can spare? Could you spare a cigarette? Sure can. Thanks. All right, you know, it’s–
I can always get $10 together, panhandle a few bucks, hit up
a friend, collect on a debt. There’s always some
way of getting $10. You got to– We got the punk rock
special joints here. (SINGING) I was a lonely soul. I had nobody til I met you. But you keep me– Maybe sometimes you
sell your clothes out on the street or everything. You know, anything you can get
your hands on, you sell it. Or you help a friend
sell something he’s got. And he gives you some
of the money from it. But I mean, you know, you don’t
have to hurt nobody to keep a drug habit in this city. You selling? Yeah, right here. What do you want? I got nickels. I mean shit, we all do
something we wouldn’t do to keep our habit together. Hey Jose man, don’t
kill my business. Come here. i got joints.
-Oh, he has joints? Yeah, I got joints.
Come here. I got joints. Come here. Give me a paper Jose. That’s how you’re smoke it. Yeah, but can I have
a paper for this guy? Come on. Jose, Come on. Jose, gimme two papers. One for you and me. Hey. Assholes. You know what
they’ll do, they’ll find somebody that’s
clean, you know, that ain’t got
high yet that day. And they’ll have
them test the dope. Sometimes that’s real nice. You know, because they don’t
know it’s a really strong. And you get real fucked up. So how you been? I’ve been doing all
right now, you know. Can’t complain, really. Start complaining nobody
don’t want to hear about it. I ain’t seen you in a while.
you still living down here? I’m sure more than one
dope tester has wound up on a rooftop with the
rats eating at his balls because so and so
didn’t cut it right. They don’t like it. How’d it go? It’s going all right. Well, it’s a fine
afternoon ladies. It’s hot as hell though. Doesn’t look like it’s
coming too fast do it? No, not really. because it’s
getting cold now, you know? Summertime is all right. You know? But now that it’s
getting kind of cold it’s going to be kind of hard. Mhm. This bag, no, this bag. No. You know, here. Keep this bag. This bag dose. OK. Get one more pull and
come on out of this Johnny. to see what you call
a midnight snack. 9, 10. That’s [inaudible]. In this one apartment
there’s $100,000 worth of drugs going down. And they got these chicks
bagging up dope and running it up to the corners. There’s really, like, you
know, a quality control. Look how nice it is. So far so good. Dope tastes pretty nice. Yeah? Yeah, yeah. Nice [inaudible], too. You know? He said it’s all right. Enjoy. OK, I appreciate that. Right, we’re going
to be paying caps. Just maybe check the lines man. Yeah, well this is good stuff. So it can hold you
know, like a decent cut. Put a one and a two on it. Oh no, you can put more
than that on this Iranian. No, on this Iranian you
can put more than that. Three or four. Yeah definitely. Oh, you know, like,
it took me an hour. First I had to wait an
hour in line to cop those. There was like a million people. One hour? Well, come on. I mean, it was like, you
know, it was a long time. I finally cop and all of a
sudden, the hondo red light, you know? So they make us– they make us
sit there, you know? basically. Everybody crouch down. Don’t say a word. So we’re sitting there. I’m glad I didn’t go. Well, I know. That’s why I never
want you to go baby. You know that. You know I always
look out for you. But anyways, so um,
so then– so we’re all crouched down waiting. And I mean, seriously,
like at least 15 minutes waiting
while they said the police are right out front. Don’t nobody move. And um, so we’re sitting there
and then I said fine, fuck it. You know? I’m going to try
to get out of here. Because like, I already have the
dope on me stashed in my pants. So um– uh– so then
there’s this guy up on the second floor. And like, there’s
no steps going up. So like, he had to pull me up. You know? And like, there was
like, a hole going down to the basement, all
these broken glass and tin cans and rats. Right? So he’s pulling me up. I’m scared of heights
as you know anyway. So like, he pulls me up. I run through the– run
through the building. Go out a window, have to hop
over an air shaft, right? Through another
abandoned building, down a fire escape, over three
fucking barb wire fences, and on the third fence
these dogs were chasing me and biting at my legs man. I fucking hop over, right? Go around through,
come out the other end like I mean, I totally
fucking destroyed my body. You know, like all
banged and scratched up. I come out and the
police are gone. The police are gone and people
are going back in the place again.
-Already? Right. -Like two seconds later?
-Right. In like two minutes.
-It figures. It figures. Like if I had waited
two more minutes I wouldn’t have had
to go through all this fucking bullshit. [speaking spanish] Excuse me, they ain’t out here. I’m waiting for
somebody sweetheart. I’m sorry but you
got to hang out across the street somewhere. I’m sorry.
-Across the street? Yeah. I’m standing right here. I’m sorry, you know, we’re
conducting business here. You got to hang out
down there somewhere. Your business is inside and I’m
waiting for my man to come out. -I’m sorry.
-Hey. You done? Excuse me? Go ahead. [inaudible]. Go ahead. It was all right man. It wasn’t all– it
wasn’t all that hot. it wasn’t all that hot. No hanging out here. Excuse me? No hanging out. I’m starting to get sick man. -Yo, B, where you going?
-Hey! Hey! Stay in your line brother. You know. Take your time. You getting it that’s all. And who’s working
the line right? Yo man. We ain’t going no
place [inaudible]. Everybody straight out. Money, straight
up, you want to cop? See you in there. Toke and dope. Toke and dope. OK. Go ahead. Come on man, you got to
move faster than that. -Yo.
-Yo. Yo.
Move the line up. Move the line up. Yeah. [non-english speech] Sometimes you think,
like, what would it be like if we didn’t have dope? I don’t think they would
be Lower East Side. I don’t think, you know,
that we would survive. Because they would be–
everybody would be on welfare. You know? The city would go
down the drain. The dope money has a lot to do
with the economy of the city. Because it does bring in a lot
of money from different states. A lot of people come up from
Connecticut, Pennsylvania, Jersey, and what have you. And they leave a lot
of money down here. Great, OK? It’s a hot night out here. I ain’t feeling that good. Come on next. Make that snappy? Yo man, you got people waiting.
Move. Go ahead. Come on, go. Yo. have your money straight out. A lot of kids who go
on to try to get a job, there’s too many kids
and too little jobs. So a guy will come
along, offer them a job in a dope spot
making $200, $300 a week at a young age. You know, as they get
older salary goes up. They start wearing
nice clothes, jewelry. They see that they can
get just about anything they want in the neighborhood. Maybe they’ll shoot a
guy, get a little respect. And for them that’s it. Some kids, if they’re
smart, they’ll work their way from
watching to bodyguard, where they bodyguard
the person selling. Into managing. Once they become manager,
they could branch off and boss will open
up another spot. And they’ll receive a
percent, like maybe 50%, 75%. Someone who lives
out in the suburbs will never see the
money that we see. You could sell 20 bundles,
100 bags in a bundle. That’s like 20,000 a day. Yeah what you want? Two coke. Next. Let me get 21. Yo. 30 coke. You have people come in
here with $400 or $500. Every day, the same people. 10 dope. That means that they’re
spending, like $3,000 a week. Some kids start
off as early as 20, thinking about retiring by
the time they’re 29, 30. I know a few guys that have
gone to Puerto Rico with half a million, a million dollars. A lot of them don’t make it. A lot of them get hooked. Spend most of the
money they save. And they don’t
have anyone that’ll back them up or care
for them, they’ll just wind up in the gutter. Some of them have
been millionaires twice, three times, and lost it
all till they got to the point where they don’t care anymore. You know, like,
they lost it all. So they’ll just resort to
shooting drugs and shooting drugs and shooting drugs. Hey! You know, the brand
names that are funny, they’re usually from
hit movies at the time. Like Black Sunday and ET
and Mr. T. A dope brand. And say Paco or Floco
or whatever, you know, the head dope guy from
such and such a label. You know, he buys at the
same place as the other guys. And they all may go
to the same factory and say, put my stamp on this. And put a one-and-a-half
step on it. And that means that for
like, every gram of heroin there’s a gram and
a half per cut. And that’s how you get
the different grade of dope on the street. And then all of a sudden, boom,
they’ll say, put a three on it. And then they’ll put it out
on the street and sell it. It ain’t beat, but it
takes you three bags to get straight instead of
one and a half or two. Oh you want some homebody? That’s all bloopters. Bloopters, how many? How many? Bloopters, bloopters. Yo boy, what’s happening man? What’s happening man? You’re the one that stuck up
the First National Bank man. Andy. I ought to turn you in
for the reward money boy. What’s up? All right. What’s up man? What’s happening? C&D, C&D. What’s up cool? C&D. They good, right?
Take care homeboy. What’s happening man? What’s happening? Works, works, works, how many? How many? What’s up Jesus Christ?
Yellowtail. Yellowtail. You dole them out. You dole them. Yellow Mellow. Yellow Mellow Yellow Mellow. [car horn] Hey que paso? What’s up? What’s happening? Listen man, um, we been
hearing some shit about you selling some dummies out here. Yo man– And beating customers? I don’t play that shit man. I don’t play that.
Yo, calm down. And what about– I didn’t do that. Yo yo, what about
putting your shit out on the street instead of ours? Man, you’re talking out
of your fucking face man. I don’t fuck with
nobody’s product. Fuck you, Fetti. Hey, fuck you too man. What the fuck does he
got to do with us man? Listen man. Man, he’s getting
greedy is what it is man. Motherfucker, you’re the
one who’s getting greedy. I ain’t getting greedy man. He don’t got nothing
to do with us man. You just coming out of his face. We don’t want you here. We don’t want you in this spot. We don’t want you at all. [gunshots] [tires squeal] Oh shit. Hey you got a cigarette? Sure. [knock on door] Suzanne. Suzanne! Suzanne. Hey Suzanne, it’s me. It’s [inaudible]. Shit. Hey, open the door. It’s four o’clock
in the morning. [inaudible]. Shut up. You’re waking everybody up. I need to hold
on to a few bucks. I already lent you money. You never paid me back. Come on, I’ve done you plenty. Dammit. Go take a walk. [inaudible]. Check this out man. I’m mad like– I’m mad
like a motherfucker man. Check this out. The other day I came here man. I bought some dope
and the shit was called the meat tenderizer man. For real? Hey, I bought it
right here man. I don’t want no money
back or nothing. You found the right man. Oh yeah? Oh shit. [police sirens] OK, he is my brother though. You know? And I– he was
involved with drugs. We will find out about it. Cause we would like to
know who the fuck did it. Excuse my language, man, but
like, that’s the way it is. You know? When you live in the lower east
side man, that’s the way it is. Eventually you find out. Every– Everybody out here
fucks up with everything. You understand? The best thing you can do is,
you know, you gotta be cool. But when it comes
to brothers man, you know, and they
know that these guys are my brother-in-law. They know, you know, who we are. You know, we don’t
fuck with nobody. They shouldn’t be
messing with us. Now whatever he did,
you know, between him. We would like to
find out who did it. And if it’s for drugs then
we have the right to know. You know? Now the best thing I did was
get in touch with the family. You know? And once the family say yo, we
got to do this we got to do it. You know? I wish I knew who did it. But like they say, drugs
lead you to your death. You know what I’m saying? Sometimes you got it. Sometimes you don’t. You don’t have it, you
find a way to get it. Heroin is a cruel mistress,
a brutal overseer man. It wakes you up early in the
morning and it takes you out. Makes you do things
you would never do. And uh, well, you
just don’t have time to worry about other
things, things that maybe you should be worrying about. Facing reality sometimes
is a hard thing to do. What’s really sad is like, the
kids that come down to cop, you know, they got nothing. Shaking their
lives up, you know? I mean, you think about it. You know, you know that now. But– But it’s amazing, you know? These young white
chicks, you know, they go into this building
with $100 and they’re straight, you know? They don’t want to go out
on the street and cop. You know, you can get your
throat slit out there. They’ll come down. Buy the guy some
dope for themselves and some dope for them. They send them out. And they’ll sit there
and they’ll get high. You know, the guys will have
the works and everything. Oh yeah? Up it puppet. [speaking spanish] I’ll tell you, you
always get loose when there’s girls around you girl. Huh? So the kids wind up using
these shitty works, you know, that who– who knows
who’s used these things? And that’s how these
diseases get transmitted. You know? You know, this
is really hectic. That’s come up slow. Darling, you can smoke
a Marlboro right? Yeah. Oh man, what am I doing? I got a vein right here. I’m having a hard
time hitting myself, do you think you
could get me off? Mhm. Yeah. You give me– You don’t
think you can hit it? No, my veins– my veins– Huh? I have shallow veins. All right, just tie your arm. I used to get off an awful lot. I was hooked for
a couple of years. Man, this is really– Susan, do you got a– And now I just get high
like once or twice a week. And I’m having a lot of
hard times, as you can see. I’ve been making like– We going to have to
take a ride down there. Because his boss doesn’t
usually put phone calls through. There you go. I just had a– I seen you know,
like one day, a girlfriend. And a girlfriend of
mine and her old man. They were arguing over drugs. -It’s crazy.
-But it’s stupid. It’s not worth it. Yeah, who’s doing more and– And who’s holding this
and who’s holding that. You know what I mean? Sweat that. In other words, let go. Sweating, I love it. And I you know, really
getting sick of it. You know?
It’s– Be careful with this. It’ll blow up on you. Even when my old man tells me,
you know, he gets– you know, he hates– you know? You know, sometimes
you’ll be arguing over stupid shit you know? You know, baby’s
really shitty man. I know it’s a drag. No good man. Just want to just clean
up this shit, start work. With my lover, I used
to do the same thing. It’s like, you know what
we used to fight over? Who was going to get off first. You understand? You’re always saying I’m right.
I’m right. I’m right. And you’re going to stop
and you’re going to stop. That’s good.
You don’t have to put anymore. The first thing you think of
when you get up in the morning is where you’re going
to get your first shot. No not really but I feel this
way about having my meth– Or you wake up
sick every morning. Well, that’s true. No you get– you through about
15, 20 minutes, half an hour, and then you [inaudible]. You got to cut that
shit out you know? You get jobs you know?
-I– Hey, it’s better than
doing what you’re doing. Something that’s
a start you know? Put a gun in my hand or
put a knife in my hand. No, no. Everybody’s got to
start somewhere. Or put a dope bag
in my hand I said– That’s bullshit. No, the first– first thought
man, if you and him are trying to kick to together– Every day you get
up you got to say where am I going to eat today? Right? Where’m I going to
get the money to eat. You know how many day
we’ve gone hungry? Right? All we’ve worried
about is getting off, getting our fix, right? Because we were sick. How many times
do I say to her– And your cigarettes? Fuck the dope, Buy
a pack of cigarettes. Miss perfect. Oh, far from it. Miss perfect. Far from it that’s for sure. You’re another one. But at least I’ll buy
cigarettes and shit. At least I buy cigarettes
too and I’ll eat too. OK?
When I have it. Everybody, I’m sure you were at
the point that she’s at, right? You might don’t be here. How much money you
have on you now? You understand? How much money I got on me? Were you ever at the
point she’s at now? He has money. What he has I got. -Excuse me honey?
-No. No?
Never in your life? No, cigarettes are
very important to me. No. You never got to
the point where you wouldn’t be– you’d leave
yourself short cigarettes to go get some dope? No. Well, I’m happy for you. No. Well gimme– let me
get two dopes man. You got tracks? Yeah, yeah I got tracks. You want to see my tracks?
-Yeah, let me see your tracks. -Can you see?
-Yes. All that. Gimme one. It’s good huh?
Tell me it’s good. Yeah. It’s the toilet. It’s the best. That’ll see me both
through the night, huh? Oh yeah, you’ll like that. All right. Thanks a lot man. OK, don’t OD now. I won’t. OK man. I got that city got that key. Know you want something. What you want? What you want? What you want? Some of both. Some of both? Only got D. Only got some D left. Let me see some tracks. You got some tracks man? I got tracks all over
the fucking place. What the fuck is with you? You see me over there. I thought I was with you. I knew I– I seen you around. How many you want to get? Gimme two D. Two D’s. You got it. Thank you. All right. Don’t OD now. All right? Yeah, I can’t OD on this cheap
fucking dope you copped for all the fucking rice in China. Oh, watch that guy Eddie. He don’t look right. Heroin is like, well, first
of all, it’s a treasure hunt. You know, you got
to find the money. You know? And then it’s the adventure,
going through the jungle or the war zone. And then it’s finding the
drugs and finding good drugs. You know, it’s dodging
the cops and uh, the thrill of the
chase, the thrill of the hunt for the dope. It’s the satisfaction,
the relief once you get something good you know? That’s always the
end result match. Then there’s the satisfaction
and the relief of getting high. Everybody needs drugs. Everybody live on drugs. Main– main– main base of the
thing, everybody– everybody can’t stop messing with drugs. I like drugs. I like to deal with drugs. I sell works to get my drugs. And mainly I love–
I love drugs. Mainly cocaine. Cocaine is a beautiful thing
when you getting high off it. And mainly when you getting
high off it and it’s beautiful. I love it. And I like it. I would never stop using it. It’s always beautiful to
deal with– deal with drugs. Cocaine is my main hobby. I would never deal with
nothing but cocaine. And believe me, it’s beautiful. I can never stop using it. And I will always keep
using it as long as I can. And it’s like a lovely
beautiful thing to me. I’m not sorry that I’ve
started messing with drugs. And I will always– I would
always will mess with drugs as long as I like to. Very much so. Cocaine is a beautiful drug. I like it and I love it. And I would always stick by it. I will always deal with it. Mainly I– I sell works for
so many period of months to get my drugs, to
build my habit up. And my needs. My needs for that–
for that bag of coke that everybody love in life. Mainly I love it. I can never stop using it. I would always use it. I will always need it. You know, for
most of the people down here it’s a
pretty shitty place. You know? they’re living
on fruit loops and pizza. When you’re high on dope
it’s like– I don’t know, I guess– well I
hope someday I get out of this fucking hell hole. I’ll tell you, you know, I never
thought about death so much. But it’s really become
a part of my life. And it– nothing matters. The only thing that
matters is feeling good. The only time I feel good
is when I’m really stoned. And most of the time these
motherfuckers won’t let you feel good. They’ll just give you
enough to get you straight. You get beat. Just part of the game, you know? You got to take it
with a grain of salt. Fuck, if I got in an
uproar over every time I got beat I’d be
dead a long time ago. You know? Maybe someday I’ll get
off this merry go round and I’ll find
something else to do. Hi, Diane? Yeah, Space. Listen, I want to stop
by for a minute OK? Thanks, I’ll be right by. A couple more man. Ow. These guys. Anyway, this chick at the
pit, she’s a weird number. She’s got uh, she’s got this
necklace around her neck with uh, it’s like a
heart with a skull on it. And inside it is cyanide. That’s weird. I got– Yeah, I was– I was
reading up on these tarantulas and they got eight eyes. And if they lose legs
they can regenerate them. You know, they shed
their skins every year. They just come right
out of it and they look– leave skins that are
exactly like the tarantulas. You’ll like, wake
up in the morning. And the next thing you know it
looks like you got two of them in there. You know? The mice are really aware
of what you’re doing for them with your tarantulas. Because the fuckers
are really boring. They have no, like,
emotions or response. They don’t like,
you know– you know, they don’t even know
that you’re feeding them. They have no idea
what’s going on at all. Yeah, the best thing
about having spiders is that feed them crickets and
like, for a couple of days you get to listen to the crickets. They sound like
you’re in the country. It’s the only really good thing. Come here. You know what you are? Come on, don’t go in there. All right, do go in there. Come out this way. This little mouse
thinks he’s rat stew. I have got to get
some new works. Yeah. These things are like a nail. Yeah. Typical. Yeah I’ve been
feeding the– the rats like beans and peas and stuff. And the mice, and
they really like them. You know? you don’t have to just buy
this food if you give them like, um, dried
vegetables, you know, they eat that just as much. It’s pretty interesting. Wow, good stuff. Rat pellets. Yeah, they’ll still be
here when we’re all gone. No, rats don’t live long. Yeah but, uh, like
during the Cuban crisis when I was 10
years old I had all these nightmares of atomic war. Sure. Those were the days of hide
under your desk you know? Like that’s going to
do some good you know? When they drop an atomic bomb. There’s nothing that’s
really stimulating the kids today except
for the fear of you know, um, out and out war. Oh, Ratso. Now see these guys are
much more intelligent. They know what’s happening. Come on Ratso. See this one’s all fat see? One skinny one and one fat one. [inaudible]. It’s like I went to um– to the
nuclear demonstration on June 12. And there’s all kinds
of people there. And there was even
punks, you know? And it’s like, really good to
see that the young people that are interested will occasionally
come out and do actions, you know? Sure. Because It seems to be an
incredible waste of time, you know, that
like, you know, guys go around with shirts
that New York rules and DC rules and LA rules. You know? But where it’s at is
that no one rules. You know, people are conditioned
to look for the differences in between people and not
to realize that they should be like working together. Well, the only thing
that’s going to wake them up is if the youth of
America is threatened. And if they’re threatened
like the youth was threatened during the Vietnam War then
there will be, you know, an overall consciousness again. If you go to school and you
realize that you’re going to come out and you’re
going to make $3 an hour and it’s not going
to pay your rent and it’s not going
to buy you food, you know, that’s a distinct
threat on your consciousness. The poor kids go into service. It’s not contained to
poor blacks anymore. It’s, you know, it’s
all the poor people. They go into the service just
like in an underdeveloped countries. It’s not that many kids
going into the army, you know? There’s plenty of them. Poor kids are all
going into the army. It’s the best thing
they could do. It gives them– It
gives them experience. It give them training. It gives them money. It gives them everything. When they come out
they can get any kind of fucking loan they want to. They’re covered medically. You know, everything is
covered for them after they get out of the fucking service. You know? Me? I’m stuck. I never went into the army. How many people have you
met recently that have gone into the service? I never even talk
to the motherfuckers about nothing man. I’m an anarchist. I never fucking
filed income tax. I ain’t did shit with
these motherfuckers. You know? I don’t want to talk
to them about it. When they said I had
amnesty all I had to do was go there and
salute the flag. How you going to get married? You know? I didn’t do it. I don’t want nothing
to do with them. You know? How you going to get married
with an identification Spacely? I have identification now. Oh, that’s good. I just sent for my
birth Certificate. But it’s the first time
I’ve had ID in 12 years. When I was 15 I picked up
this 31-year-old hooker. You know, she told
me if a woman makes too much noise
while you’re making love with her she’s faking it. And they’re either trying
to get you to cum fast or trying to get you
to tip them more. I think it’s a
little bit of both if it’s a whore,
personally on that. Haven’t had a woman
like her in a long time. She was really good in bed. At first, you know,
I really dug it. Because like, what
14, 15-year-old boy gets enough sex? You know? But uh, I stayed with her
like, two, three years. And I grew tired of her. And I wanted a girl
a little bit younger. And uh, this is about a
year before, you know, Hendrix and Joplin and
all them people died. I met– I met Jaycee and
John the same time together. I was walking down
Haight Street. I was about 17. And me and Jaycee,
just like, right away we turn to each other you know? We both had– uh, you know, we
kind of looked alike, you know? And uh, you know, we
both had long brown hair and wore the same
kind of hippie shit. You know, patches everywhere. Patches on our patches. It was all during the
Vietnam War ear, you know? And uh, and we’re all
radicals or hippies. Riot fanatics or
something, you know? I mean, I wasn’t going
no fucking Vietnam war. So we all had,
like, an affinity. We were all against the
government you know? Us, the Indians, Cesar Chavez. You know, everybody was
kind of like together, even though like, we
had different causes. It was the same
cause all in all. You know, smash the state. Anyway STP John was
the leader of the gang. He got shot while taking
a piss behind this guy at this speed freak’s house. And on the one-year
anniversary of his death mad and Jaycee went out there
and we took a couple of chicks and a bunch of booze
and got real drunk and fucked the
chicks on his grave. Threw up. Did everything. You know, pissed
on the gravestone. And he’s dead now too. He got blown away in a $5,000
heroin deal about five, six years ago. They found him floating
in a lake in LA. And I was drunk and wanted
to see my old girlfriend. I got there and she was
there with her new boyfriend. He had all his friends there. And so like, we were there
for about five minutes. And the guys said, well, I
think it’s time you leave now. And I said, well, yeah? Well fuck you. I’ll stay as long as I want. This is my ex girlfriend.
You know? I came to visit. And all of a sudden
one dude flew at me. I think it was her boyfriend. And um, then his
friends jumped in too. And they were like jacking me
up in the fireplace, you know? And uh, this one
guy was hitting me. And it felt real hard. So I grabbed his fist. I said, oh my God,
fucking brass knuckles. You know? So I grabbed him by the hair
and pulled his head down. And all of a sudden his ear
popped into my mouth so I like. bit as hard as I could
and pulled his head back and spit his ear in his face. All this blood came
out and everything. So detectives came and
everything with the ambulance. Started asking me,
who did this to you? Who did this to you? And I said get the
fuck out of here. I spit on one of their faces. They took me to the
hospital and put me into emergency operation. The cocksuckers say
well, he’s too high. So they didn’t give me any
uh, no anesthetic, nothing, you know? They did two layers of
stitches, like fished all around in my stomach and everything. See if anything was broken. Man, you could hear me
screaming for three city blocks. No fucking shit. That was like, some of the most
pain I ever felt in my life. I mean, it had to be as bad
as having a baby at least. It was actually two slices. They guy had sliced me twice. So there was like a
little piece of meat in between two– both slices. So they had to cut that slice
of meat off before sewing me up. And um, so they cut
that piece of meat off. And they sewed me up fine. Two layers of stitches, mind
you, with no anesthetic. And after the whole
thing I said, well, can I have the piece of
meat that was laying there on the uh– the
little uh, you know, tray that they put at
the side of the bed. Looks like you’re going
to eat drive-in diner. And they said no. And I said how come? They said, well,
it’s not hygienic. And I said what the fuck
are you talking about? That’s me. you know? You going to tell me I
can’t take me with me? So the doctors all stepped
out of the room for a minute. And when they did I hopped
up off the operating table. Grabbed the hunk of meat
and stuck it in my pocket. [harmonica playing] Thanks a lot man. -OK.
-Take care baby. Bye bye babe. Take it easy. What’s up? [inaudible]. Hopefully he in
there. [inaudible]? [singing] Yep. Hey man. Hey what’s up Spacely? That’s a nice [inaudible]. Yeah, I had it
hanging around man. Took it out.
See if I could sell it. -Yeah you want to sell it?
-Yeah. Gimme a ride. All right. Yeah. Figured I’d bring it out of
the house, get some for it. Don’t be too long man. What’s happening man? How you going? Hi honies. What’s up baby? Hey, you’re good at that man. How much you want for it? $20 man. Yeah? Listen, I’ll tell you what. Yeah, the man’s
getting uptight. Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, if you can wait
like 15 minutes for me to get it because I just
copped and you know man, I can take the money back. I want it definitely. Hi, is mom there? Hi mom. Hi mom. How are you? Good. Everything’s been
going good with me. Listen mom, you know,
it’s been awhile since I asked you and like,
I’m uh, really put out. I’ve got to come
up with my rent. You know, I got some money
coming to me next week. But you know, I need
to have some cash now. Even $100 would make it. You know? I love you. You’re so sweet. You always come through
when I need you. If three or four guys, one
of them was a drag queen. And uh, I spit on the street. And uh, one of them said,
you know, got all indignant and said, oh, you
tried to spit on me. I said I did not you
fucking drag queen. And uh, you know,
words were exchanged. And then you know, a
couple shove happened. And all of sudden they
chipped out chains and started kicking the shit out of me. You know? They beat me over my head. Just kept beating
me and beating me. And uh, the cops came
and uh, you know, they stopped everything. But you know, it’s– what
it is, it’s just a scar over the– over uh, over the lens. You know? If you can see, it’s like
a white cloud you know? Can you see it? Do you see it? It’s like– it’s like
a $5,000 operation. And what they do,
they use like, a laser with a small little vacuum. And they go in with
the laser and they cut away the scar tissue. And then they got this little
vacuum that sucks it up. You know? It’s $6 if you want to come in. Come on man– The money or leave. Fuck you then man. I’m getting out of this– Right.
Right. You’re leaving now.
-All right. All right. I don’t know what you
fucking be knocking on my door early in the morning
for, asking for a spike and all that dumb shit. I’m sorry! Goddamn! You got a cigarette? You got a cigarette? [MUSIC GRANDMASTER FLASH, “THE
MESSAGE”] Hey Larry. Hey. I wasn’t able to get–
I didn’t have the money to get all of them at once. But I brought you two
of these, the ones you saw that you liked. And this is the–
the style I was telling you about that had
the like, little red stone in the back. And it’s the same
thing, about five each. Oh yeah. So take these three for now and
I’ll bring you the other nine. OK. Money. [MUSIC GRANDMASTER FLASH, “THE
MESSAGE”] Well, I knew Cindy since
she was 11 years old. She was um, in this
gang in Berkeley called The Red Rocket’s. And uh, I was really in
love with her and you know, she was like, very cute
when she was really young and we decided to get
married, which was at the time a good idea because I was drunk. And one morning, it was about
5:30, 6:00 in the morning. She woke up and complained
of stomach pains. I was a little worried you
know, because she was pregnant. All of a sudden
she just aborted. My only son and heir came
popping out you know, covered in blood. It was gross. It was the grossest
thing I ever saw. You know, I didn’t
know what to do. You know? So I just took– it
looked like a little rat fetus or something. it was
just about this big, you know? She was only about three
months pregnant I guess. And it’s really disgusting. I know it’s illegal. Because you’re supposed to
report those sort of things. But I just took the
fetus and I threw it in a plastic trash bag. Put it out in the garbage. I mean, I didn’t know
what to do with it. You know? What are you going to do
with this little thing? Nothing than a huge period. It was weird. But then after that happened
then I sent her back to her mom in Washington state and a
couple weeks later her mom called me up and said that Cindy
had been run over by a logger truck while riding on
the back of a motorcycle with this other guy. Then i started shooting heroin. You know, because I had
all these nightmares about the baby, about her. About how things could have
been different I guess. But uh, I don’t know, maybe it
was just never supposed to be. Guess it wasn’t was it? But uh, I don’t know, I
always kind of blamed myself and I had horrible nightmares
for at least a couple years. Pretty much over
the nightmares but– This is brown dope. In other words, they
made it with Nestle Quik. Bastards. Goddamn, it’s so
obviously Nestle Quik. You can smell the chocolate. Ain’t that funny? It’s sometimes a lot of fun. I mean, if you can imagine
a movie in your mind, that’s what it’s like
when you’re really high. And you could be with
somebody that you love that’s dead and long gone. But you’re so high
right now that they’re right there next to you. And they’re kissing
you like they used to, laughing like they used to. And you can see it. It’s right there. Cause for some reason
opium lets you create whatever you want in your mind. I’m trying. I’m a bit nervous. [coughs] [vomits] You want me to tell you
what it’s like to be sick? Like the worst flu you ever had. And you’re tired. You got no energy. And you sweat a lot When.
you’re under the covers. When you’re not
under the covers then you freeze and you’re chilled. Ugh. it’s the worst. that’s why it’s better
to quit gradually then to just stop all at once. Not cold turkey. Cut bag down to two bags
a day then one bag a day. Then do methadone for a few
days and do– that’s it. . I’d be off. [vomiting] [music playing] [music playing]

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