Trump’s Border Wall Visit & A Government Admission About UFOs | The Daily Show


President Trump’s trip to the
West Coast. Yesterday, the president
popped into California to host some fundraisers,
talk about housing issues and stock up on edibles. But easily the highlight
of his trip was getting to visit his favorite child–
the border wall. WOMAN: President Trump took time
from a fundraising trip to visit a chunk of border wall
in Otay Mesa, California. He met with several construction workers and was invited
to sign the wall, which he did, with a Sharpie. He boasted about the wall
calling it, the “Rolls-Royce”
of border barriers. It’s designed to absorb heat,
so it’s extremely hot. The wall is, uh… You won’t
be able to touch it. So if they’re gonna climb it,
they’re gonna have to bring hoses and waters,
uh, water. And we don’t know where
they’re gonna hook it up, because there’s not a lot
of water out here. If you think you’re gonna cut it
with a blowtorch, that doesn’t work,
because you hit concrete. This wall can’t be climbed.
This is very, very hard. We had 20 mountain climbers. That’s all they do.
They love to climb mountains. And this was the one
that was hardest to climb. And so begins season one
of Mexican Ninja Warrior. (laughter) (applause and cheering) I will say,
if you forget the xenophobia and all of the racism,
it’s pretty cute how excited Trump gets
about his wall, right? He reminds me
of little kids bragging about what they’ve built
out of Lego. Have you ever seen them? You know, they’d be like,
“It’s super strong. “And this is for the policemen,
and they can’t break it. “And this one shooted
the lasers. And there’s a booby trap
for when the Mexicans come.” (laughter) It’s also funny how Trump
signed the wall with a Sharpie, like he’s worried we’re not
gonna know who built it. Like… This man is so insecure. No other president physically
signs their accomplishments. Like-like, Abraham Lincoln
didn’t go up to the slaves like, “You’re free!
Now hold still! Hold still. There you go.” Now, the problem for Trump is
that sometimes his enthusiasm
actually gets him in trouble, because he gets carried away and he says secrets
that he’s not supposed to. One thing we haven’t mentioned
is technology. They’re wired
so that we will know if somebody’s trying
to break through. And you may want to discuss that
a little bit, General. Sir, there could be some merit
in not discussing it. Okay. I like that. -That was a great answer.
-Yeah. I’ll just tell you,
they’re wired. Okay? They’re wired. Again. Tell me that’s not adorable. Trump is so excited
about the wall that people have to stop him
from explaining its weaknesses. He’s like,
“There’s a door that opens. “If you cut the wire right here,
you cut the right one, “but we won’t tell them
it’s the red one. We won’t tell them.” And kudos.
Kudos to that guard. He’s just so slick. “Uh, there could be some merit
in not discussing that, sir.” That is the nicest way I’ve ever heard someone say,
“Shut the (bleep) up.” (laughter, applause) That’s what that was. (applause and cheering) We should… we should all start
using that, right? Yeah, next time
you tell your boss that your missed work
for a funeral, and your co-worker’s like, “But
you said you were at the beach,” you could be like, “There could be some merit
in not discussing that, Bob.” (laughter) All right, let’s move on to an alarming new report
about air travel. If you have a flight coming up,
you may want to be careful about what you drink,
’cause a new study looked at the water safety
from a dozen major airlines. And those airlines
with the cleanest water are Alaska Airlines, Allegiant,
Hawaiian Air, Frontier and Southwest, while the dirtiest water
is found on board Delta, American, United, JetBlue
and Spirit Airlines. That might surprise you, right? The study suggests sticking
with bottled water on planes and avoiding the coffee
and tea. You can also use hand sanitizer instead of washing your hands
in the bathroom. Yes. Turns out if you’ve been
drinking water on a plane, your bowels may be in danger. And honestly,
this was surprising to me, ’cause I always knew
that the water in the bathroom wasn’t
for drinking, right? -You use that to wash your feet,
but… -(laughter) I didn’t know that the water they serve you
can also be dirty. Like, how does it get that bad? Like, do they take the
hot towels from business class and squeeze the water into cups
for economy? Is that what they do? You’re just like,
“Hmm. What-what is that taste?” “Sir, that is the taste
of success.” (laughter) And that list was
pretty interesting as well. You’ve got Alaskan at the top, and then all the way
at the bottom is Spirit Airlines. And I know, I know some people
think Spirit should be ashamed that they’re number ten,
but to be honest, I was impressed that they
have water on their flights. Yeah, normally,
the only refreshments on Spirit -are your own tears of regret.
-(laughter) Spirit Airlines. Our water
is the least of your problems. (laughter, applause) And finally… tomorrow is September 20, the big day when everyone
is supposed to raid Area 51. -(whooping)
-And although this thing just started out as a joke,
it turns out they might actually
find something. NEWSWOMAN: The U.S. Navy
now confirms UFO videos made public
by The New York Times and a UFO research group
back in 2017 are the real deal. Images of that rotating thing
captured by U.S. Navy aircraft. Sensors locking in
on the target. Commander David Fravor
saw it firsthand during a training mission,
describing it: like a 40-foot-long Tic Tac. The ability to hover
over the water and then start a vertical climb
from basically zero up towards about 12,000 feet and then accelerate in less
than two seconds and disappear is… something
I had never seen in my life. The Navy says it still doesn’t
know what the objects are, and officials
aren’t speculating. Holy shit. I hope that’s a UFO,
because if it’s a giant Tic Tac, -that’s even creepier.
-(laughter) What, a giant Tic Tac
just flying around in the sky? But do you guys understand
what’s happening here? The U.S. government
is officially confirming– officially–
that in 2017 the Navy saw a UFO. And I hope,
I really hope it isn’t aliens, because it would be a really bad
time for them to visit Earth. Yeah. Can you imagine?
They’ll land and be like, “Take us to your leader,”
and we’ll be like, “Uh, sorry,
he’s signing a wall right now.”

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Reader Comments

  1. Heidy

    ok ok, so I usually travel in Jetblue or delta. I never drink the water and I ask for no ice, cuz I don't wanna risk it, but they always serve water from a big water bottle, so you are telling me they refill that plastic bottle with tap water and pretend its new?, otherwise how can it be so dirty. I could believe that from Spirit tho.

  2. V M

    if this pilot encountered technology that could hover at less than 20 metres then go from 0 to 6,000 metres vertical in less than a second., He never stood a chance

  3. Theresa Mayo Tinaglia

    I like how his example for a president who didn't sign his accomplishments was Lincoln, who literally signed the EMANCIPATION PROCLAMATION. In fact most if not all presidents sign their accomplishments…LAWS.

  4. Wifi Funeral

    Nah but for real fuck trump too. Trump is very ill for this country but god help us if the Democratic Party gets voted in. WHOOSH there goes our rights to say whatever we want no matter how hateful, there goes our rights to our guns no matter how big the magazine size is. ( extended double barrel magazine clips )

  5. Jennifer Ray

    Does Trump really think he can convince people that he had 20 of the worlds best mountain climbers come out and try to climb his little segment of border wall
    lmao gtfoh crazy old man

  6. K Mac

    i still can't get over the fact that the goverment confirmed the ufo's and nobody is talking about it ther was a naruto run meme for like three days but nothing about the ufo's

  7. Gravity

    That probably wasn't a UFO. The government has a legitimate interest in a perceived existence of extraterrestrial life on Earth. That being said, it might actually be a UFO, and could be from another military, a private test by a major corporation (or an unreasonably intelligent person), or an actual "mystery". I know one thing for certain, and that's that the government knows a decent amount about it. Thry wouldn't have confirmed it as a UFO to the public otherwise.

  8. Clos R

    This is great hahaha funny what kind of people think and act like this O ya raises people well net time u eat a peace of fruit or vegetable remember a Mexican touched it first hahaha to u u fucks…

  9. cam mann

    Guess he gave up on the snake and
    Alligator idea.

    Trump- I’m gona get some many beautiful women down to the border it will heat up very very hot and I mean very hot and no one, no one will get
    Over this wall.

  10. Marcus Hiebert

    Trump didn’t even say Mexican . Trevor did. Also a border wall is not racist because the legal immigration is still as open as ever

  11. Nikki Dierolf-Ackerman

    Can someone build Trump into the wall if he’s so obsessed with it? I’d be okay with a wall if we put him in it, then you’d actually hear me chant Build the wall! But with a few nice doors (we won’t tell him about that part).

  12. Ric ThaRula

    We know that all the elements and other "stuff" that makes life possible on Earth can be found throughout the cosmos yet the possibility of aliens is crazy. Yet a virgin giving birth to a magic baby that moonwalks on water isn't? Hmm……..

  13. 2612563

    Heat absorbing made the wall to hot to climb? what happen if the Sun didn't show up? use electricity to power? I should move to the border wall in the winter….

  14. Bob Steenson

    FYI the border wall is FAKE

    look closely at videos and you'll notice they start filming and stop filming at a 50 foot intentional OPEN GAP that's present every 1100 feet so, that the criminals can continue to flow into America — you are being fooled and lied to — WAKEUP PEOPLE !

    TRUMP = FRAUD

  15. Mr. Rothstein

    Trump was asked to sign, so he gonna say “No” in front of cameras, then be on this show for “you were behind this and do not have the confidence in signing it?”

  16. Faurocious

    Nothing worse than a white Houseni**a who enjoys willingly blowing a white c**k. I would say you are a Traitor to your race but your only partial right Noah?

  17. adnan nan

    alien – take us to you leader ….. nobody- sorry our president is on signing the border wall…..ahahahahahahahah that funny man……as always noah just like mr.bean…thanks bro

  18. VicM R

    I guess we could use that wall as a generator because it has so much heat…even at night 😉 BTW, they are not going to climb it, they're just going to make thousands of tunnels…wasted money.

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